More comment on the great swine flu pandemic

From websites everywhere :

Pigs would fly before a black man became president of the USA. 100 days after Obama is sworn in, pig's flu!

Graphic from Graphjam.com.

Swine fever - pandemic or snouts in the trough?

Some poor Mexicans die from an influenza infection originally mutated from pigs, and some international tourists catch a mild infection from the same influenza family. Behold! The great self-interested panic industry swings into action.

• Health officials get praised for warning us (but not punished for false alarms) and, surprise surprise, funding needs to increase. Health scientists join in.
  
• The media love to hype a good panic, so they talk in self-important faux-serious concern about measures being taken and not taken, struggling to keep their gleeful excitement off-camera, while mentally spending their ratings-driven bonuses.
  
• Politicians rush around making noises about taking the matter seriously, just in case something might go wrong.
  
• The relevant pharmaceutical companies announce that countries have insufficient drug supplies, and obligingly give the media all the scary information on what might go wrong.
  

Flu is normal, and deaths do occur. What's the normal incidence of this strain of flu, and what's the normal death rate? No-one seems to be asking. A mild warning gets hyped into "global pandemic" and the next day, our economies go under even more stress, while those with a vested interest in the panic reap their unjust reward.

If this is for real, I'll be amazed. Swine flu pandemic? More like a load of pig's bollocks!

Regarding Susan Boyle, you've all been had

I'm astonished by the media gullibility (or cynicism) over Susan Boyle's performance on "Britain's Got Talent." Not only are commercial radio, TV and press full of coverage and analysis, but even respected public radio programmes, psychologists and, bizarrely, economics writers have hopped on the bandwagon.

Come on, people! The whole thing was a set-up, notwithstanding the faux surprise on the judges' faces. Simon Cowell, the show's creator, controls every aspect of the show, and deliberately selects entrants for a variety of talent, prettiness and oddness. Boyle was chosen and primed for exactly the effect achieved - to demonstrate that appearances can be deceptive, and to unleash a tidal wave of guilt and comment on hearing this ugly woman sing an aptly chosen poignant song with feeling and naive talent.

So people judge on appearance, and such judgements are sometimes wrong. What's new? Nothing. Appearance-based judgement is a learned behaviour for a good reason - some of the time it sort of works. It's not infallible, but we all buy into the PC guilt and self-flagellation when we're caught out.

The resulting media frenzy was exactly what Cowell wanted, and no doubt will result in even higher ratings and earnings for his programme. I can't believe that the media are all stupid, so some must be as cynical as Cowell in driving this story for all it's worth. I've been suckered in as well - for God's sake, here am I am writing about it; too. To borrow a phrase from Private Eye magazine: "Pass the sickbag, Alice!"

There's nothing quite like a good piece of well-delivered invective

Gordon Brown addressed the European Parliament and got this tongue-lashing in reply:

Move over Caroline; Mara's my new #1

Spain's 20 Minutos is running an online poll to determine the world's most beautiful politicians. Naturally, I felt compelled to add my votes. Unfortunately for Britain's Caroline Flint, my affections have switched to Italy's Mara Carfagna. Of course, my change of heart is purely political, you understand; unlike Ms. Flint, she is a minister in a right-leaning government.

What's going on with Super 14 uniforms?

When did the idea of 'away' uniforms come into the Super 14 rugby competition? Half the squads look like they're playing in pyjamas when they're away. On the other hand, we've seen the Force dressed like the Hurricanes; wishful thinking, perhaps? On tonight's Force-Brumbies game, everyone wears blackish shorts and socks(with yellow tops) and the ref looks like he's a member of the Brumbies squad. (Force fans might agree!) C'mon guys; you aren't top English soccer teams; 50,000 fans aren't going to buy your away colours. Stick with the main team strip. And sort out the ref colours.

Stop whining about your losses

Investment means risk. You want high returns on your money for no effort, just the use of your cash? High returns come with high risk, and high risk investment means exactly what it says. OK, maybe you've learnt something; so how about low-risk investment? Guess what? Low risk does not mean risk-free. It does not mean perfect markets nor perfect management. It does not mean you get your money back come what may. Even low risk investments can go wrong. If you don't want any risk, bury your surplus cash in the cellar. Of course, as Zimbabwe shows, even that isn't risk-free.

Stop whining and get on with life. And if you are so much smarter than all those people you're blaming, then put your money where your mouth is and start a business. Of course, that's the riskiest investment of all, but at least you'd be in a more authoritative position to cast aspersions on others.